Ecclesiastes Part 10 and 45 Lessons About Turning 45

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45 Lessons About Turning 45

This Sunday, October 11, I turn 45 years of age.

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As a bit of a public service, I felt it would be helpful to share with you insights gleaned from this season of life.

In addition to this weeks photo where I was rocking a vest long before any hipster was born, here are 45 things you should know about turning 45:

  1. You have to increase the font size on your phone because you cannot see as well.
  2. You go to the eye doctor and they say, “This is what happens at your age.”
  3. Professional athletes look like kids.
  4. You are not over the hill, but you are perched at the top of the hill and rolling forward.
  5. If you eat carbs you blow up like a Puffer Fish.
  6. The classic rock station starts playing songs from when you were in high school.
  7. Sometimes you wake up with a sleep related injury for no reason.
  8. You start complaining about the government more and more.
  9. Sometimes you take a nap, other times you take two naps.
  10. You resign yourself to the fact that you cannot get one candle for every year on your cake without burning the house down.
  11. Dancing cheery boy bands make no sense.
  12. You buy a vehicle because it is comfortable, not because it is cool.
  13. You can drive faster because you can afford better insurance.
  14. Your friends start taking turns playing “midlife crisis.”
  15. Sometimes after you walk across the room, you forgot why you went there in the first place.
  16. You start handing your technology to your kids for tech support because you cannot figure it out.
  17. Movies where old guys are still action heroes seem interesting.
  18. Your spouse has officially put up with a lot from you.
  19. Your sons know that you can outwrestle them for one round, but after that it’s all downhill for you.
  20. When you drop something you ponder whether or not you want it bad enough to pick it up.
  21. You realize that pretty much everything you cared about in high school was silly.
  22. Your mom was right.
  23. Your dad was right sometimes.
  24. Letting a 16 year old drive seems completely crazy.
  25. Any rocker your age or older still wearing leather pants is just sad, especially if they are wearing leather pants while singing at a casino.
  26. Recess is greatly missed.
  27. Your kids are not little anymore.
  28. You start to look forward to grandkids because you miss when your kids were little.
  29. Heaven seems a bit closer.
  30. You shudder to think what 45 would be like without Jesus.
  31. Pulling an all nighter is in the same category as flying pigs.
  32. Old people start to just look like people.
  33. Celebrity gossip is a total yawn.
  34. You are more grateful than ever for real friends.
  35. Most of what you learned in college is forgotten.
  36. The clothes you wore as a teenager have finally come back into style after a few decade hiatus.
  37. Some books have become like old friends.
  38. Being called “sir” or “mam” no longer causes your eye to twitch.
  39. Sometimes you eat desert first just because no one can stop you.
  40. Looking at old photos of people you love chokes you up.
  41. When a teenager texts, you have no idea what the shorthand means so you cannot even LOL.
  42. It seems like your 21st birthday was just last week.
  43. You will be 46 before you know it.
  44. You can see God as a Father more clearly than ever.
  45. 45 ain’t bad.

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Meaningless Life? Part 10, “Climb the Ladder: Ecclesiastes 6:1-12“, is available today. Check out all of  Pastor Mark’s new series here.